177 replies to this topic

[Aziz]

"Man is nothing else but what he makes of himself. Such is the first principle of existentialism. It is also what is call subjectivity, the name we are labeled with when charges are brought against us. But what do we mean by this, if not that man has a greater dignity than a stone or a table? For we mean that man first exists, that is, that man first of all is being who hurls himself toward a future and who is conscious of imagining himself as being in the future. Man is at the start a plan which is aware of itself, rather than a patch of moss, a piece of garbage, or a cauliflower; nothing exists prior to this plan; there is nothing in heaven; man will be what he will have planned to be. Not what he will want to be. Because by the word "will" we generally mean a conscious decision, which is subsequent to what we have already made of ourselves.... (blah blah blah) But if existence really does preceede essence, man is responsible for what he is. Thus, existentialism's first move is to make ever man aware of what he is and to make the full responsibility of his existence rest on him. And when we say that a man is responsible for himself, we do not only mean that he is responsible for his own individuality, but that he is responsible for all men."
~Jean-Paul Sartre

One of my favorite philosophies.

[The_Law]

True Lies:

Helen Tasker: Have you ever killed anyone?
Harry Tasker: Yea... but they were all bad.

13th Warrior:

Lo, there do I see my father.
Lo, there do I see my mother, and my sisters, and my brothers.
Lo, there do I see the line of my people back to the beginning.
Lo, they do call to me. They bid me take my place among them.
In the halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live
...forever.

Boondock Saints:

f*ck-Ass: Make like a tree... and get the f*ck outta here.

The Mummy:

O'Connell: Good bye Benny

Tombstone:

Doc Holliday: I'll be your Huckleberry. I'll play for blood.

[Billy Pumper]

quote from me two years ago



Officer: Son why in the world were you going that fast

Billy: just trying get to my house before Santa does

Officer: Ok smartass, i am gonna go ahead and give you this ticket, MERRY X-MAS

Billy: asshole

Officer: what was that

Billy: nothing

[Sgt. Bojo]

"meg... for the first four years of your life, i thought you were a house cat..." -Peter Griffin

[misterweels]

~I know what day of the week you were born. I was so poor growing up. If I wasn't born a boy, I'd have nothing to play with.


A girl phoned me the other day and said "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home.


During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.


One day as I came home early from work, I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, "Hey buddy, why are you doing that?" He said, "Because you came home early."


It's been a rough day. I got up this morning, put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase, and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom.


I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.


I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.


I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.


I'm so ugly. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.


When I was born, the doctor came out to the waiting room and said to my father, I'm very sorry. We did everything we could. But he pulled through.


I'm so ugly. My mother had morning sickness, AFTER I was born.


I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.

Once when I was lost, I saw a policeman, and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him, "Do you think we'll ever find them? He said, "I don't know kid. There are so many places they can hide."


My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.


I'm so ugly. I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get.


I went to see my doctor. "Doctor, every morning when I get up and look in the mirror, I feel like throwing up. What's wrong with me?" He said "I don't know but your eyesight is perfect."~ Rodney Dangerfield

[Cleric]

quote from me two years ago
Officer: Son why in the world were you going that fast

Billy: just trying get to my house before Santa does

Officer: Ok smartass, i am gonna go ahead and give you this ticket, MERRY X-MAS

Billy: asshole

Officer: what was that

Billy: nothing

haha had a similiar run in with the law going 75mph in a 55 zone.

Officer: Ive been waiting for you all day.

Cleric: Well I was trying to get here as fast as i could.

Officer: (chuckle) I should give you a ticket for that but I'll leave you with a warning. (chuckle)

[Aziz]

I was in a liquor store yesterday:

Gay dude that works there starts asking me sh*t and helping me out... So im like whatever.

I bring the beer and smirnoff ice (for the girls) to pay for everything:

Gay dude (smiling): heh, only queers drink smirnoff ice!
I (serious face): you know what? im actually homophobic. I hate queers!

The dude shut his face and did not say a word to me after that

[AshFromHousewares]

" Oh...you could blow? Well I'm a mushroom cloud layin mother fu*ker, mother fuc*ker. Everytime my finger tips touch brains, i become superfly tnt. Im the guns of the navarone. In fact, what the fu*k am I doin' in the back? You're the motherfu*ker should be on brain detail. We're fu*kin' switchin' right now. I'm washin' the windows and you're pickin' up this !@#$%^&'s skull."-Jules

[*3RD sfg* killswitch]

haha had a similiar run in with the law going 75mph in a 55 zone.

Officer: Ive been waiting for you all day.

Cleric: Well I was trying to get here as fast as i could.

Officer: (chuckle) I should give you a ticket for that but I'll leave you with a warning. (chuckle)

That is not your quote that was a joke i read on the internet a while back ass clown

[Ezekiel]

In astonomy class today...

Teacher: *Talking about super novas* Though we haven't seen one visually in hundreds of years.

Student: When was the last one we could see?

Teacher: Around 1609.

Student: How long do they usually last?

Teacher: About a hundred years.

Student: Oh, so we could still see the last one today?

We have some f*cking morons in the class. I know it's sort of a blow off class, but damn.... people are morons.

[The_Albino]

Heard one today.

"I f*ck you because you're my !@#$%^&."

Song - Para-Noir
Artist - Manson

[Billy Pumper]

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra

[monster]

Heard one today.

"I f*ck you because you're my !@#$%^&."

Song - Para-Noir
Artist - Manson

"I think you try to hard. The whole "I am so extreme" gig is getting old.

If you want to impress us, go suicide yourself and stream it for us. I can host it on my webserver if you decide to go that route."



that's my quote

Edited by monster, 08 February 2006 - 02:08 AM.

[Yatzee_Squirrel]

some attempt to redefine limits. kimber removes them
-back of my guns and ammo mag.


(i will be buying a kimber on my 21st b-day, so yes i am a little biased)

just thought that this sounded kool so i thought i would post it

Edited by Yatzee_Squirrel, 08 February 2006 - 10:15 PM.

[Sgt. Bojo]

Ralph Wiggum- "Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!"

[DarkShadow]

Blinds when Equipped ~ Bossman in June

[Nayr]

"Ask not for whom the bells tolls, it tolls for thee."

[Sniprwulf]

"I don't wanna large farva, I want a goddam liter of cola!"

--supertroopers

[Billy Pumper]

"Keyboard not found. Press < F1 > to RESUME. "
---A real error message found in many common bios

[Ezekiel]

"Keyboard not found. Press < F1 > to RESUME. "
---A real error message found in many common bios

Sounds like when I was setting up my computer with my friend.

Friend: *Inserts floppy disk to install drivers...*

Computer: "Error code 3 [or 4 I forgot exactly.]"

Friend: "Error code 3, what the hell does that mean?"

Me: *Looks it up using laptop.* ". . . Error code 3. . . Drivers not found, insert diskett with new drivers."

Friend: "Microsoft has a sick sense of humor. . ."

Me: "I know, I know. . . "

Thank god we got the dvd drive to read the install CD, or else, I wouldn't be using a computer right now.