20 replies to this topic

[Inertia]

So we are looking to hire on a few quality minded people to do some landscaping for our company. This is what one moron sent me and my reply to him. Let me know what the next step should be... hire him or not?







From: Eric

Subject: Re: Driver/Laborer Position
Date: Saturday, July 11, 2009, 1:39 PM
HI ERIC UNEMPLOYED BARELY GETTING BY CLASS A CDL CLEAN MVR NOT A SPEEDING TICKET IN NEARLY A DECADE.

I AM 29 6FT 180PDS BROAD SHOULDERS N BIG ARMS MADE FOR LIFTING NOT A DRINKER SO I HAVE THE ABILITY TO SHOW UP AT SUNRISE EACH AND EVERY DAY.

IF YOU ARE READY TO GO A.S.A.P. AND ARE WILLING TO FOREGO BUREAUCRATIC REDTAPE CONTACT ME AT (*******) OR MY AUXILLARY CELL AT (*******) AND LETS GET ON WITH IT.

YOU WILL BE AMAZED BY MY ABILITIES I PROMISE JUST DO ME THE COURTESY AND DONT WASTE MY TIME ON B.S. LIKE MAKIN ME COME ALL THE WAY OUT THERE JUST TO FILL OUT AN APPLICATION SO I CAN PRAY YA CALL ME SOMEDAY.

REDAY TO GET TO WORK A.S..A.P. THANK YOU VERY MUCH

--- On Mon, 7/13/09, Robert > wrote:

From: Robert
Subject: RE: Driver/Laborer Position
To: 'Eric

Date: Monday, July 13, 2009, 8:11 AM
Eric,
In the future, when you solicit work, please take the time to send out something that at least looks professional. After reviewing your email, we have decided that there would be no need for further communication with you. As a Employer, we demand quality people, and the first impression is that you are not. Please review your emails prior to sending them.


From: Eric
Sent: Tuesday, July 14, 2009 8:28 AM
To:
Subject: RE: Driver/Laborer Position

YOU SEEM LIKE A PICKY JERK-OFF WHO WILL NEVER BE HAPPY NO MATTER WHAT AND ITS PEOPLE LIKE YOU WHO RUN THE SAME AD OVER AND OVER AGAIN BET YA NEVER WORK ADAY ON THE OTHERSIDE OF A DESK YOUD DIE IN THE HEAT OVEREXERTING YOURSELF POINDEXTER



I almost want to hire this prick and show him what a real days work is. We have a job that requires using a 12# sledge hammer to drive in posts, the project is almost 7 miles long.









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[DarkShadow]

seems he fails to write things up, and you wonder why he can't get a job lol.

[Ezekiel]

"All caps" + can't spell "ready" = Needs to be scrubbed from the gene pool.

[�HADOW109]

That guy probably has no job experience anyway

[Raccoon00]

lol hes a N1gger right?

Edited by Raccoon00, 14 July 2009 - 02:25 PM.

[Sniprwulf]

"bureaucratic red-tape" = convict

[Faber]

hire for sure..

[Novahawk]

Sounds like a winner

[Inertia]

My only thoughts at this point is how far I can push this Douche Bag without violating the law. I though maybe something like correcting his emails and sending them back may be a good start

[Ezekiel]

My only thoughts at this point is how far I can push this Douche Bag without violating the law. I though maybe something like correcting his emails and sending them back may be a good start

Be sure to print it out, correct it with a red sharpie, and scan it and e-mail it back to him. Be sure to add that big frowny face at the top.

[MainEvent]

At least give him a D+.

[*CHILIDOG*]

Make sure you use purple ink on your edit. Red makes people nervous... Oh and ad some sparkle's too.

[Jack]

AND ARE WILLING TO FOREGO BUREAUCRATIC REDTAPE

That's code for "i can't pass a piss test and I have a criminal backroung", plus bad grammar, and all caps fail. Motherf*cker is a winner.

PS Inert, Shadow and I have skype with unavailabe numbers...give us his number so we can have some fun.

PPS nigga has an AUXILLARY CELL? i gots to get me one of those yo

Edited by Jack, 14 July 2009 - 06:57 PM.

[WhiteRabbit]

He's bullsh*tting you to a certain extent. I would bet that he's on parole or probation and has to prove that he's attempting to get a job. I wouldn't be shocked if his P.O. calls in a week.

[MainEvent]

Shut up, White Rabbit.

[Ahkmed]

He used all caps, and everyone knows that means you are serious. You know he will work when he is that serious and he doesn't even care about the law, he will break it just for you and your company he is such a good worker. Not to mention he is big with wide shoulders I mean common don't be a pussy this guy seems legit.

Edited by Ahkmed, 14 July 2009 - 10:49 PM.

[WhiteRabbit]

Shut up, White Rabbit.

ok.

[WhiteRabbit]

Shut up, White Rabbit.

ok.

[Sniprwulf]

[Scroll_Lock88]

God damn sniper dont be posting pics of chris' mom on here, that violates international laws regarding food pornography.


Think that's bad, my old part time job doing inventory had a sh*t ton of winners as far as job applications go. More often than not they apply just to get hired and not show up so that they can continue to claim unemployment.


Alot of winrars in our society